Friday, February 3, 2012


I watched the movie 50/50 tonight with Ray and my dad.  It was funny, heartbreaking and offensive all in a compact 90 minute low budget film.  I liked it because I felt that it focused on the patient's perspective of everyone around them.  It highlighted annoyances like people constantly saying "It's going to be okay."  Or saying "I am sure you are feeling shocked and numb." in response to a patient saying, "I feel fine."  If anything, I hope people watch this movie and learn to better validate their patient's feelings instead of projecting their own.

I don't want this to come off "judgy".  I made mistakes as a caregiver.  I had moments of insensitivity.  I remember feeling frustrated at my mom's lack of energy level, or her reluctance to go to my last sonogram.  I know she was feeling bad and tired, but I wanted her to be there.  I tried to hide my disappointment, but she knew and I regret my feelings to this day.

The movie is very heavy in language.  Even the "C" word that I detest.  But for what it accomplishes in terms of advocacy, I rather enjoyed it. 

The one line I distinctly remember, "The more syllables in the cancer, the more serious it is."  Breast has 1 syllable.  Ovarian has 4.... I am in no way down playing breast cancer.  I just found that ironic. 

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