New Challenges

To this point, I have felt very pleased with my decision regarding my surgery and I have been extremely open about it.  However, I find myself in a new challenging position.  In this situation, I feel embarrassed, uncomfortable and modest. 

The locker room.  I am now coaching swimming at the local YMCA and with that employment, I get a family membership.  I decided Friday that I was going to take a mid-day class and shower there to be ready for a formal celebration afterwards.  Everything was all fine and dandy until I had to shower in a large room with a bunch of naked women.  As a former swimmer, this would not phase me in the least; until now.  Sans areolas (funny, spell check doesn't recognize this as a word), I clearly look different.  I get noticeable stares.  I find myself rushing and covering and cowering to hide my scars.  I find myself embarrassed.  Not ashamed, but definitely uncomfortable and not open to discussing my surgery with strangers while naked. 

For the first time in 2 year, the 2 years since my surgery, this situation has me baffled.  How do you deal with this?  The obvious answer is getting nipple tattoos.  But I don't want that.  I want a mastectomy tattoo, and I have one scheduled, but in the meantime.  How would you feel if you saw someone without nipples in a locker room?

Money Talks; Cancer Research Suffers

Susan G. Komen announced today that they are cutting the 3-Day Walk event in seven cities!  7 Cities!  That's nearly a million dollars worth of money to cancer research and countless amounts of awareness lost.

This article relates the decline in participation and lack of fundraising potentially to the controversy last year with SGK and Planned Parenthood: Komen breast cancer charity cancels walks in seven U.S. cities

I urge anyone reading this blog, or others, to put aside political opinions, religious "laws" and personal reactions to SGK and Planned Parenthood to see the "real" loser in this battle.  The real loser is cancer patients and survivors.  People are reluctant to donate to SGK and SGK events because SGK supports Planned Parenthood and on the other side are reluctant to support SGK because they broke partnership with Planned Parenthood.  It's a lose lose for SGK.  But again, who is the real loser?  All the women that SGK supports and touches with their power, reach and funding. 

As a former 3-Day walk participant, 3 times over, and raising nearly $10,000 single handedly, I can say that I have done my research.  SGK gives around 80% of funds raised to research and advocacy.  80%!  They aren't paying secretaries, or breaking even on event costs.  They are putting money where it needs to be. 

I urge you to find other ways to express your political/religious opinions that doesn't include punishing cancer patients and women.  I know that is a lot to ask.  I hate to say it, but not funding programs from SGK because of Planned Parenthood (whether for or against) is misguided.  It's not having the intended impact desired, and instead is harming women across the country and the world.  Think about it.  Cancer doesn't discriminate.  It strikes all races, religions, political party members and genders alike.  Fighting cancer with politics and religion is ineffective.  Cancer, I assure you, doesn't care. 

Memorial Day

My Yiayia (Greek for Gandmother) used to tell me that she visited my Pappoús (Greek for Grandfather) every Memorial Day.  He was a WWII vet who was given a letter of commendation for saving his captain's life.  He died shortly after I was born, so I don't know him, but everyone just loved him. They said he was funny and kind. 

For the last four years, my Yiayia and my mother are barried next to my Pappoús.  So visiting this Memorial Day was an emotional ball.  I hate driving there, but I love being there.  It's like writing an e-mail or text.  You can't see the other side of the conversation, but you know they are there; if that makes sense.  I just feel whole, like a family again.

My aunt plants flowers every Memorial Day around the family headstone.  This year my children and their cousins (my brother's children) were there to help.  I remember planting flowers every spring with my mother.  I remember my grandmother's affinity to the rose bushes we had on the side of our house.  She was come in bloody from the thorns, but she loved to prune and trim and clip bouquets. 

It was a nice few hours to spend with everyone talking and laughing and just being together again.

Relay for Life 2013- Luminarias

These brave women who lost their fights with cancer paved a path for me and others to become empowered to make better choices and gain knowledge of our own risks.  These involuntary martyrs saved so many lives.

By law, it's covered!

As I sift through the Angelina Jolie post, articles and news bits, I see this recurring attitude that somehow Angelina being rich made it possible for her to have corrective surgery.  This is SO not the case.

Based on Women's Health and Cancer Rights Act of 1998 (WHCRA), all insurance plans that cover mastectomy also cover related medical needs like reconstruction.  The U.S. Department of labor has a fabulous FAQ section on this very topic: Your Rights After A Mastectomy

If you have Medicare/Medicaid, the law doesn't cover you the same.  And in the BRCA situation, it might not cover reconstruction;  but that is determined by individual states.  According to Cancer.org;

"Do the WHCRA requirements apply to Medicare or Medicaid?

No. The law does not apply to Medicare and Medicaid.  Still, Medicare covers breast reconstruction if you had a mastectomy because of breast cancer. Medicaid coverage varies in each state, so you will have to get this information for your state."

I expected, at some point, a negative backlash on Angie, although I have to admit, I was hoping it was going to be all support and sunshine.  I felt however that I had to but this falsehood to rest.  Woman are protected well.  There is still work to be done, for sure, but BRCA carriers and women with breast cancer are not doomed to be un-womanly, or "mutilated" because of their economic status.  And Angelina's reconstruction has nothing to do with her wealth.  Actually, unless Hollywood now offers group insurance plans, I bet she did pay her surgeries out of pocket; where mine was covered completely. 

Another Sister

Angelina Jolie announced yesterday that she too carries the BRCA1 mutation and has had prophylactic surgery to remove both breasts. 

Cancer is blind, it does not see color, gender, wealth, intelligence, education, place in life or any discriminating factor.

Know your risk, and address it appropriately.

Article: Angelina Jolie Reveals She Had Preventative Double Mastectomy

I really like the way she explained her situation and decision in this article: My Medical Choice

It didn't happen often, but there were women, men, people that strongly disagreed with my choice to have prophylactic surgery.  Someone even said I "mutilated my body."  Despite overwhelming support from family and friends, there are always whispers that are heard a little louder, and comments that are taken a bit harder and stares that can make you feel tiny and ashamed.  I am glad Angelina is speaking out.  I love this blog, but she has the real power and captive audience to speak about what it's like to have BRCA and why it completely changes a person's life.

Race for the Cure DC 2013

The Race for the Cure DC was this morning and it was a great morning!  The weather held out nicely.  It wasn't too hot or too cold, although quite humid.  I had a great race coming in at 26.45!  That's a new personal record by officially nearly 3 minutes, but technically 1.5 minutes (I've had faster training times, since my last official 5k).  The event was awesome, the speakers were amazing, we were a force of pink ripping through the Mall.  I love our new Mother's Day tradition!  The race was followed by brunch and Georgetown Cupcakes....enough said.  Perfect day. 

Happy Mother's Day to all the mother of all kinds.  I miss mine everyday, every moment.  Another moment missed today when I crossed that finish line.  I know she was watching from heaven.

For every starting line;

and every finish line.

For every miles I run;

and every step I take;

you are with me, mom.

 

Pre-race, runner's start

Post race, face! (we don't even look winded)